You Might Be a Fertility Girl...

I recently read something similar to this on the internet, and I decided I just had to come up with one myself.

I remember how much my family and I laughed when we first heard Jeff Foxworthy's "You Might Be a Redneck" comedy routine. I was recently thinking about the different things that we hoping-to-get-pregnant girls have in common, and the things that we laugh about together. I decided to bring these two brain children together, and so, in the style of Jeff Foxworthy and the tongue-in-cheekness of one going through fertility treatments:

You might be a fertility girl if...

1) If you've ever been behind a car in traffic that has a t.u. longhorns sticker in the back window, and you think to yourself that it looks awfully similar to the uterus/ovaries/whatever diagram that is on the wall of your doctor's office;

2) If someone asks you what day it is, and you automatically reply with the day of your cycle, before realizing they meant what day of the MONTH it is;

3) If you now have a new vocabulary full of acronyms such as IUI, IVF, RE, ICSI, HCG, etc;

4) If you're at one of your many ultrasounds of the month, and you realize that you are in desperate need of a pedicure, and the sad state of your toenails embarrasses you more than the fact that you're half naked from the waist down;

5) If you've memorized your health insurance policy for fertility treatments;

6) If you've called the HR department of your company depressed wanting to make sure you read the health insurance policy correctly when it states that it will cover abortions and domestic partner benefits (along with benefits for domestic partner's children), but it won't cover a dime of the IVF treatments for you and your loving husband;

7) If you forget that some people can get pregnant the good, old fashioned way - unassisted;

8) If you're buying eggs at the grocery store and it reminds you of your next ultrasound, and then later when you're preparing those eggs for breakfast, you suddenly feel terribly sad for that poor Mama Hen;

9) If you're reading your People magazine, and you find yourself getting jealous of whatever is in the water in Hollywood since it appears that babies are in, and the chihuahua fad is so last year;

10) If you're such a hormonal/emotional train wreck from your daily injected concoctions, that you go from gushing over your Mr. Wonderful in the fresh produce section of the grocery store, to not more than five minutes later yelling at him in the self-checkout lane because he picked up the plastic grocery bags off of the insanely sensitive scales before you completed payment and it messed up your whole transaction...

YOU MIGHT BE A FERTILITY GIRL! ;)